I always get worked up before going to the doctor’s. I can never get an appointment with just one, the same one. I get shifted between 2 female doctors and 2 male doctors.
Today I saw a new doctor, and he was amazingly kind. Dr Kadir actually listened to me. He wasn’t typing at the same time, he wasn’t distracted. All his attention and concern was on me, and I appreciated that. As soon as I sat down, the word vomit happened. I told him I cannot sleep. My anxiety keeps me up. What if, what if, what if. I cannot shut it off. Sleep to me is a lack of control, it is a vulnerability. It has peaks, and it has lows. Lately it is at its peak and it is affecting my job, my social life and my mood.
He listened to all my concerns and all the things keeping me up at night. He prescribed me Zopiclone. I said that’s fine but one doctor cuts the dose in half and gives me 4 tablets, whereas another gives me a full dose for 7 days. His response “That is pointless. There is no use halving your dose because this is a severe problem, 3.75mg isn’t going to touch you.” Here is a doctor paying attention to me, and not making me feel like I am a liability. I couldn’t be more grateful. He has suggested to make these 7 tablets last over 2 weeks and if the problem hasn’t improved to come back and we will do a medication review.
I currently take Paroextine and it has been wonderful for the last year. However over the last 3 months I seem to be having more mood swings, less sleep and more ptsd symptoms. So the next visit may involve a medication change. I think I am okay with that, but if it is a new ptsd specific medication I may have to go see a psychiatrist to get it prescribed.
Let’s not worry about that for now. James is on his way over for a cuddle and to listen to why I am so anxious and potentially feed me bad food.
positivepants! 